Outrageous Love Letter to the Cosmos

This letter was written in the Outrageous Love Letter group that Meets weekly online on December 21, 2020

To me, intimacy means that I am known and accepted for my own personhood.  I am accepted for my body, my identity, my integrity, and my tragic flaws.

 When I stopped believing in the Imperial All-Knowing Zeus God of my childhood, I tried dissolving my intimacy with the divine.  I tried dissolving my ego into a perfect cosmic unity. If I have no personal identity, if I have a seamless unity with all there is, then there is nothing to protect, nothing to suffer.

 

But time and space, my daily pressures to eat, survive, get along with others created for me a separate identity which I defended.  And I realized that only must I defend my identity to survive;  I realized that I want a positive affirmation I matter; that my own insights, my own growth, my connections to others are recognized and significant to the divine.  What could be lonelier or crueler than a cosmos that regarded my unique spark of creativity as insignificant and unacknowledged.  Being acknowledged and significant propels my yearning to contribute to a better world.

 

That is why the value of uniqueness validates my existence and my yearning to be seen.  The unity of the cosmos expresses existence uniquely through my eyes, uniquely through my ears, and uniquely through my body. 

What emerges is that I am more than a separate ego; I am a cosmic expression of an intimate cosmos waiting for me to give my unique gift and waiting for me to love openly and wholly.  The perfect word for this intimacy is EROS, which is the great allurement and creative joining from which newness emerges in the Universe.

END.

I wrote this letter in response from a prompt from Dr. Marc Gafni:

“Reality is Eros. Reality is Desire, Allurement, and Intimacy- the three great faces of Eros.   You are a unique configuration of Eros, Desire, Intimacy and Allurement. Your deepest heart's desire is the desire of evolution awakening in you as you and through you. You are a unique set of allurements. Your allurement and desire perfectly match the deepest needs in your unique circle of Eros, Intimacy, and Influence.  In meeting those unique needs uniquely addressed by you, you meet your own deepest need and fulfill your deepest heart’s desire.”  - Dr. Marc Gafni